Sunday, September 19, 2010

What Else Is There?

I recently find myself asking introspective questions. Since i walk to a lot of my classes, I find that i have a lot of time to do so. I'm actually typing this out in the middle of homework, only because I don't want to go back to it. For all the creativity in my mind and body, I don't have the "get up and go" to actually put it to use. I also find that I have a severe lack of privacy here in the dorms, which I guess I knew was gonna happen, but in crucial moments, it wears on me. Not to sound depressed or anything, because believe me, I'm not, but I really need something to keep me going. In some ways, I feel so depraved of human physical contact, that I feel awed by it when I do feel it. I guess this is too general, and it sounds like i get no love at home, which is bullshit. But it's not that form of love that I need right now. Its the love of a woman who isn't family. I need a female, here, who I can confide in, and ask advice from, and hopefully not be laughed at for it. I don't have the liberty of having that "girl you grew up with" because I moved around so much, but I hope to establish that here. Call me sad and pitiful, but I shook hands with a girl recently, and inwardly, I was amazed by how soft and small it felt...so perfect. Fuck this sounds sappy. I would hate to have a full paradigm shift (which is a good webcomic by Dirk I. Tiede) by talking about Linkin Park's new album, so I'll save that for another post. Song of THIS post is Royksopp's "What Else Is There" from The Understanding.

Kiba

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