Monday, January 24, 2011


Today deserves a blog post. I could bitch about how bipolar my Monday was, but honestly, I'm tired of bitching. I'm tired of being a bleeding heart every time I post here, and I'm tired of how depressed I sound. I'm tired of many things, but there's one thing I won't be tired of anytime soon. My friends. They listen to me bitch, crack jokes, offer decent suggestions and are just there. During my month off, I was ready to come back to college, but not for classes. Oh no, I wanted to come back for these crazy losers on my floor. They make it all worth it.

However, something is seriously bringing me down. I'm starting to wonder why I wanted to be an artist so much. I'm pretty sure I would mizerable (see what I did there, Gackt fans?) in anything else, but I just don't have the urge to pick up the pencil today. Too bad I have the first part of a project due tomorrow. Oops. By the way, if you can't hear the smirk in that last comment, you totally don't know me.

Finally, I've decided that this place is far too dreary. I want to redesign...Throw in some white, and blues, some blacks and some neon hues. Anyone wanna help me redesign? Maybe I'll post some design ideas up on deviantArt. Love that place. Good night, I have work to do.

Ricky Kirkland

Saturday, October 30, 2010

Ride On Shooting Star

You know, I don't know exactly why I'm posting, I just felt like it. Its been an interesting month or so since I've last posted, I'll say that. Its finally getting cold over here, got another trip to Chicago coming up and I'm really looking forward to going home soon. Too bad its depriving me of my off day, Friday. Oh Fridays, how i love you~ Oh well, Chicago is gonna be awesome, even if we're going to museums.

The JAC club here on campus (Japanese Anime Club) hosted a Halloween party last night at some person's house and I have to admit, I had a pretty decent time. I went as a Reaper and mi amiga Gloria went as Hatsune Miku. She looked completely different and totally amazing last night. And then she had her own entourage! Anyways, there were some very well done costumes, SSM Brawl, and spiked punch, which made an interesting night.

I don't have too much else to say tonight, so imma get back to working on this website due Monday. Have a great weekend all.


P.S. - Song of the post is Ride on Shooting Star by The Pillows.

Sunday, September 19, 2010

What Else Is There?

I recently find myself asking introspective questions. Since i walk to a lot of my classes, I find that i have a lot of time to do so. I'm actually typing this out in the middle of homework, only because I don't want to go back to it. For all the creativity in my mind and body, I don't have the "get up and go" to actually put it to use. I also find that I have a severe lack of privacy here in the dorms, which I guess I knew was gonna happen, but in crucial moments, it wears on me. Not to sound depressed or anything, because believe me, I'm not, but I really need something to keep me going. In some ways, I feel so depraved of human physical contact, that I feel awed by it when I do feel it. I guess this is too general, and it sounds like i get no love at home, which is bullshit. But it's not that form of love that I need right now. Its the love of a woman who isn't family. I need a female, here, who I can confide in, and ask advice from, and hopefully not be laughed at for it. I don't have the liberty of having that "girl you grew up with" because I moved around so much, but I hope to establish that here. Call me sad and pitiful, but I shook hands with a girl recently, and inwardly, I was amazed by how soft and small it perfect. Fuck this sounds sappy. I would hate to have a full paradigm shift (which is a good webcomic by Dirk I. Tiede) by talking about Linkin Park's new album, so I'll save that for another post. Song of THIS post is Royksopp's "What Else Is There" from The Understanding.


Sunday, August 29, 2010


Thats what friendship is, thats what peace is, thats what this is. Why am I dealing with other people's shit right now? I think I've been asking myself that question all summer and I still don't have a good answer. Does teenage angst continue past the early teenage years, or is regular angst justifiable? I feel a headache coming on, I'll leave it at that. Song of the post is Daft Punk's Fragile from Tron Legacy. I'm gonna go finish my homework and sleep. When I wake up, I hope the world has its sanity back. Goodnight


Saturday, August 28, 2010

Sweet Potatoes (aka Short Post)

I would like to make a short post tonight, as I reflect on my life and feelings, namely while listening to my music at 0.7x the normal speed. Very trippy experience, I assure you. My first week here at college has ended, and has left me feeling slightly overwhelmed, yet totally at home. I love it here, but i have noticed my lack of true free time and the loss of interest in some of my internet activities. We'll see how much week 2 changes me eh?

For Drawing I (a course I have tues/thurs), we have been assigned an extra credit project: do one drawing in your sketchbook every day. Today, mine was of a girl, her long wavy hair creating the katakana for my name, and a couple of words along the outer strands. The trippy music and a woman who has captured my heart on and off were the inspiration for this. I find myself unable to truly talk to her, but she visits my thoughts on a regular basis. Our current common ground is somber, and honestly, I would be fine not talking to her, not uttering a word, if i could just once hold her in my arms. I wonder if she smells of cigarettes...I wonder if it even matters. I don't think it does in the end, I would still want her in my arms. I don't even care that she's taller than me. I smile when i think of her single dimple when she smiles, i think its cute. I even called her once, the call didn't last long, but my heart did an unmanly flutter...ugh. She'd never earn my ire, my moodiness, my anger, but I would gladly give her my happiness, my dry wit, and maybe even my love, if not just tender affection, and tender and I don't even get along.

Part of me wants to link this to her, but I think that would be...odd? Eh, not sure if she'd even approve...Wasn't this supposed to be a short post? I'll post again at some point. I love you all who read this, honestly.

Song of the post is Sia's "Sweet Potatoes" (at 0.7x speed)


Tuesday, July 20, 2010

End It Tonight

Now, this is the title solely because it's the song I'm listening to when i decided to post. Don't get any ideas people. Now onto the real subject of this post: Music. Never, never ever, EVER call me a music purist, or i will embarrass the hell out of you. See, while i like many genres of music and thousands upon thousands of songs, I'm also a simple guy. I'll keep a song on rotation just because it balances raunchy lyrics with a good beat. Hell, i may not even understand or decipher the lyrics of a song until days or weeks later, but if it sounds good, its a keeper. Yup, I'm that type of guy. A song just has to sound good, or elicit some sort of emotion out of me, and BAM, I'm sold. I guess that's why a good chunk of my music is instrumental or remixed. Music is fuel to my writing, it inspires moods, scenes, characters, plot, everything! My body is a canvas, music is the paint, the color, the LIFE.

By the way, Guitar Hero is like a gateway drug for music. You will discover bands and songs you never even considered while still jamming to your favorites. But even above GH is Youtube and a little site i like to call Hype Machine. I can neither dance or play an instrument, but music makes me want to do both with a fiery passion that overtakes me like typhoons wreck islands. I've had songs throw me in the pits of depression and be okay with it, only to listen to another playlist that made life seem like pure beauty. Music is just that powerful, don't fuck with it. Music is the addiction that needs no cure. SO! I will now introduce the world to the songs that have made a stark difference in my life...I'll just have to scroll through my zune to find them first.

Ten Songs That Changed Me (in NO particular order)
1. Violet Hill - Coldplay: I can't describe it, it needs no words, it's just good.
2. One More Time - Daft Punk: Sweet Mother of JESUS this song is one i heard while overseas in Japan on Toonami, and it haunted me until i downloaded it on iTunes years later. It brought Electronica to my front door and is an honored house guest for LIFE. (it would be number one if i was ranking these bitches).
3. SpottieOttieDopaliscious - Outkast: This song's title still doesnt make much sense to me, but the story it tells does, and that trumpet in the background is smooth as hell.
4. Death Becomes Him - Whitechapel: Some sick part of my soul craves this song, and I like it, simples as that. No screaming, just heavy ass guitar and drums.
5.Joga - Bjork: Fuck. ing. shit. This song just overpowers me, and has once brought me to tears. I feel like im high above the world and earthly concerns when i listen to this...its just...damn.
6.Papercut - Linkin Park: What an album opener. If i had to put anything by linkin park, it would have to be this. Linkin Park defined my teen angst years, and appealed to the fact that everyone has a dark side. Listen to the lyrics, do it.
7.Distance - Kaskade: Ah, i knew this list was missing something. While most of Kaskade's music would make me go bi for him, this song was just special. Its not even my favorite from him, it just resonates with me more. And its smooth as fuck.
8.Mizerable - Gackt: Dear christ, i almost forgot GACKT, and the song that introduced me to Visual Kei, which was my prominent genre for like 2 yrs. Ah, Gackt~ ♥
9.Find It Hard - The Bridges: Oh dear, one of the two country-ish songs i can actually stand, the other again being by this band. See thats just it, it made me branch into a genre i hated, and recoiled from, but this group stuck with me.
10.End It Tonight (Seekae Remix) - Teenagers In Tokyo: How the hell did I almost forget this...its this post's TITLE for Christ's sake. This song wraps up this list more because Seekae's spin on it than TiT themselves. I've never had the kind of chill, spacey, imaginative thoughts that this song gave me before...until Hype Machine slapped me in the face with it. If i could keep count of how many times i've played this...the number would probably scare me. I love it, simple as that. The original is okay though.

Many songs did not make the list, i can tell you that now. From Kick, Push by Lupe Fiasco to Prayer by Hyde, many other songs stir up something deep in me, but this list was supposed to originally be five songs, before i figured out that wasn't enough! Thank you music, you've saved my life.

May they bury me with a pair of earbuds firmly stuck in my ears,


Saturday, July 10, 2010

4 Minutes til Lockdown.

Actually, its more like half an hr, but hey, who's counting. I'm down in the south visiting my family for the weekend, and im having a pretty good time. Okay, i don't get much sleep, but besides that, I'm having a pretty good time. I didnt know my family had this many people in this many places, but I guess you learn something new everyday. We had some people coming from faaar up north in a BUS for christ's sake. And speaking of Christ, these people are pretty religious. So far, it hasn't been overbearing like i thought it would be, but I guess we'll find out tomorrow: Sunday. I have gotten to sit and chill with some members, and you can tell we're from the same family, especially my "cousin" (he's only a couple years younger than my dad). He acts just like my dad and uncle...ah, gotta love family. I do wish that one of my cousins, who is in the Air Force atm, could have made it, but he's still in training. I texted him a bit, and he seems a little sad that he's missing out on this.

I've been getting along with my half sister, which kinda surprised me, but i was hoping it would happen. If she wasn't here, I would probably regret goin on this trip. The drive down wasn't too bad either. I didn't get to drive, but i'm not even sure i would have been able to handle it, like she could. She drove from where she lives (6 hrs from my place) to Charlotte, which took about 7 hrs. Knowing she probably got less sleep than i did, I was impressed. My pops was knocked out, which is completely ironic, seeing as his snoring kept us from getting to sleep the last two nights. I may need more coffee before we get busy today. Well, thats pretty much all I have time to post today. Maybe i'll summarize this trip when I get back home. If im not too tired, which I probably will be >:P

Song of the post:
4 Minutes Til Lockdown - Redman (and some others). It's rap, but some lines crack me up, its good stuff, if not a little dated since it came out last year. Check it out.